the geek,

I'm just another guy next door.
Stop bothering me if you have nothing for me.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

when was the last fucking time i cried? long ago.

and guess wad? i am crying badly now and it feels so bad, that even my voice changes.

my dad called me and my hp went batt flat aft work. so to get him, i went back to shop and call back to my dad. he tell me to meet him at blk 82 at red hill. he say near the mrt station. head towards the Shell patrol station and can find him nearby.

so i took the fucking train to that station. the only petrol kiosk i seen is quite far away and i headed there. i found no blk 82 and i continued walking there. i walk and walk and found that i got lost. with a batt flattened phone, i cant do anything much but to find a public phone. the worst part is that i found no phone. so fuck it. singapore sucks with the lack of public phones in wulu places. then the next thing i noe is that i end up at the old RP campus. i went to the esso station opposite it and tried to make a call. the fucking phone doesnt accept my phonecard and doesnt accept master and visa as well. fuck it. i went inside the 24 hr shop to get a phone card and the assistant tell me sold out: even fucked up. u noe, i have been walking for more than an hour and u all should know that i had a knee injury last time. standing for long hours in shop is already very jialat for me liao and not to mention walking long distance. my leg is like breaking and finally i decided to take a cab down to queenstown mrt station.

over there i finally managed to get a fucking public phone which accepts my fucking card. so i called my dad. he didnt even appreciated that his fucking son who dunnoe how to get to the fucking place, who had walked a fucking long distance, to and from, trying to find the place and contact him. in the conversation, he scolded me siao and lotsa stupid nonsense. not even a word of concern. u noe how i feel ma? imagine u are fucking tired, still have to do up the things to give ur group members so they can do something, legs breaking, and fucking pissed coz u simply gave some fucking directions which i cant find my way to. and when i got relieved that i found a phone to contact u, u simply scolded me like some dumb fuck son of a bitch lidat. thanks alot dad.

so after that fucking call i decided to call my mum to tell her abt it. and obviously, my dad got pissed coz i complained to my mum. in the end he drove me back coz i just refused to drive back. i tell him my legs breaking and i dowan to drive. he already received the call from my mum and he was fucking pissed. and the whole fucking journey back home he kept scolding me like some dumbfuck. nice try. i am just some dumbfuck. yea, i am stupid. i dunnoe how to navigate around redhill. singapore is so small. but too bad i dunnoe how to go here and there. sorry that i dunnoe how to reconise the roadnames. sorry that i got lost. sorry that i cannot get a proper phone to contact u earlier. sorry that i called u back. sorry for hearing u scolding me. sorry for complaining to mum. sorry for being such a letdown, dad. sorry for making u 2 quarrel because of me despite telling mum not to kp u. i am sorry for everything. i am just stupid.

thanks for letting me know that i am real dumbfuck. and thanks for making me walk like some fucker in the middle of nowhere, with little lightings and not even a handful of souls walking on the street. thanks for driving me back, but sorry i dun appreciate it. u noe, when you were scolding me inside the car i feel so fucked up that i wanna ask u to stop and i go back by meself. thanks for everything and sorry for everything.

i am crying now. u think i feel good? u think i wan u all quarrel? think for urself u cb. u think everyone is like u ar? know how to go anywhere. i am just sorry for everything. i shouldnt have learn driving from u. sorry.

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